Doubling as a poor nonsensical sexual innuendo as well as the chronological progression of mobile phone aesthetics, the above title offers a glimpse into the latest manoeuvre by cellphone companies to get you to fork out your hard earned doe for something that you probably already have.
As a child of the 90s I’ve been lucky enough to have witnessed the advent of mobile telephones. Hamstrung by the technology of the times, initial cellphones were “bricks” (in hindsight) – large antiquated monoliths that served one, maybe two purposes.
Holding true to Moore’s law, the processing power of cellphones has since increased exponentially, a trend that appears to have been inversely proportional to the size of the handset itself – well until the novelty wore off at least.
The Samsung S3, S4 and Galaxy Note series have once more ushered in the “bigger is better” adage (admittedly, Samsung still caters for those who can’t handle it’s immense size with their Mini options). The intentional choice to make the phone large, as opposed to the unavoidable technical restrictions that begat the goliaths of the past, has somehow brought sexy back for these colossal creations.
Whilst incredibly successful, even the iPhone’s moderate size is purportedly on the increase. Tech website GBR recently published a piece titled, “Solid report claims Apple’s iPhone 6 will finally feature a bigger 4.8-inch display”. The longstanding feud between Samsung loyalists and Apple ‘fanboys’ is only too apparent in the comment section of the article: “Once again, Apple copying off of Samsung’s innovative sizes” opens up the discussion, only to be retorted by, “Yup, Samesung’s (sic) only innovation is building it bigger. WOW. Something that nobody else honestly would have thought of.”
Apple iPhone 6 Concept Render
Point being, big cellphones are in vogue. Granted, big screens offer more impressive visuals but the novelty value is likely the unique selling point that’s really pushed Samsung into stratospheric sales. So what’s the next ‘big’ thing so to speak? Hmmm, let’s think, how can we get people to buy smartphones that have become so advanced their differences in performance are almost incomparable to the human eye? Let’s make them curved! They’ll sure as shit notice that!
Samsung Galaxy Round
At the time of writing, Samsung and LG were reportedly weeks away from announcing their latest curved display smartphones. The venture seems to once again be a marketing tactic aimed at leveraging the novelty card to drive sales. Whilst apparently having some benefit for televisions, curved screen technology’s adaptation to cellular phones is not yet proven to be beneficial in any way. Some have put forward it may contour to the user’s face more snugly during phone calls – I’m still unconvinced.
I guess the point of what I’m trying to say is if you can’t make something better, just make it stranger.
Now let’s go buy an iWatch and a bent TV! I mean what’s money for if not that eh? Young moola baybay.